The Great Nilkhet Experiment

As a gullible and naive me from the past stood in the crowded alleys of Nilkhet for the first time holding a poorly printed copy of Crime and Punishment, I knew I had to buy the book. The shopkeeper asked for 500 taka. Forgetting Amma's wise words to be sturdy, I made a puppy-face and begged him to make it 400 taka. He did. I came home victorious.

It was only after a friend of mine bought the same book for 190 taka did I truly comprehend the dark lanes of lies, betrayal and treachery that is Nilkhet. So, how do you conquer Dhaka's very own Diagon Alley?

TEST THE WATER BEFORE PLUNGING IN

Shopkeepers on the outskirts of the compound will keep poking you and making the outrageous assertion that they have "everything". Surprise, surprise! They don't have "everything," including the particular book you want. So, they'd make you wait, get those books from other shops and sell them to you at a higher price.

You should ask around for prices and say no even if the price seems fair. Remember, in Nilkhet, there's always something cheaper.

CONQUER OR BE CONQUERED

Rule with an iron fist. Use the thumb rule of bargaining – offer half of the asking price. If you've learned anything in your years of shopping with your mother, it's that you should never be afraid to sound ridiculous when bargaining.

A wise customer is always a ridiculous one. Being reasonable is a hint of weakness and Nilkhet never mercies the weak. Be so bold and loud in your approach that Nilkhet realises you're here to stay.

TAKE AN EXPERIENCED FRIEND

Even a conqueror needs their general, their confidante. For conquering Nilkhet, you'll need an experienced haggler friend who ravages these wretched lanes.

This friend will take you to their trusted shop in the deepest corners and will also teach you how to get out of the labyrinth. Reading the seller's mind, establishing personal relations for future prospects, getting you that special discount – this is your buddy. 

BUY OLD BOOKS

An old book is like the middle child of a family, neglected yet useful. For a bookworm on a budget like myself, Nilkhet is a glorious haven. If you're buying a second-hand academic book, not only will you be saving half the money, but you'll also get some wonderful suggestions and tricks provided by its previous owner.

If you're aiming for even cheaper, look around for vendors on the footpaths just outside the market. There's the "everything for 100 taka" dude or the old man near the intersection selling books more ancient than himself. The books are a bit ragged, but where else would you get five books on ancient Bengal history for 450 bucks? If a self-help book claims to fix your life in 200 pages, Nilkhet can at least make sure you don't require a penny more than 100 bucks on something as silly as fixing your life.

Remind Ifti to be quieter at hasiburrashidifti@gmail.com