Of love and other demons

What makes a relationship work? Is it love and love alone? Or is it a mixture of every component of human behaviour? To love is to be patient, be understanding, be adventurous, be wise and then there are times when you need to be downright foolish.
Some, however, take that folly to a whole new level. Compromise should be part and parcel of any good relationship, but once sacrifice equates a loss of dignity, compassion and above all, love itself, the tear in the relationship shows up. This progressively deteriorates and at one point we are left with nothing but emptiness.
Falling in love is a wonderful experience where you are presented with the opportunity to explore the individuality of your significant other and start from there. Once you try to mould that individuality to cater to your needs, obsessions and insecurities, love becomes tainted.
Some lovers consider it natural to exchange their email passwords, give access to their social media profiles or show them text messages that they receive during the course of the day. These are all signals of a looming disaster; once this relationship matures, chances are both the boy and the girl will face a tremulous relationship.
Temper is another aspect in a relationship that needs to be addressed with utmost care. Although it is natural for people to get annoyed at times, losing your cool, repeatedly, is something that should not be tolerated. It is often observed that some men resort to violent behaviour which paves way to  physical assault of the girl. Lost and immersed in love some women, married or otherwise, try to console themselves that such onetime affairs can be excused, but in reality such behavior only leads to further physical harm.
Relationships should be based on trust and mutual understanding. And there should be an open mind to accept things. Every individual is unique with their nuances and that must be respected and tolerated. This is what makes the loving experience special. Each individual presents his/her unique qualities and we are to love the person for who s/he is.
It is not possible for us to know everything that has happened to the person you love. And neither is it necessary. Although it is true that we are truly who we are based on our past experiences, it is not wise to dwell in it. It would not be an overstatement that our relationship with our other halves must be based on trust and understanding.
Sometimes couples face this dilemma as to where to draw the line in a marriage or a relationship, or to define a 'zone of no entry'
It is important for a girl to understand and accept that her man might admire the beauty of the new girl in university, which does not equate to him falling for her.
The boy must also appreciate that although every man she meets might not have the ‘best’ of intentions but the point must be clear that she is matured enough to judge people on her own, and does not require an extra pair of roving eyes.
It is quite natural for a guy to want to spend some quality time with his poker buddies and a girl should have her space to go window shopping with her besties. To be very blunt each individual must know where to cut the leash and hold it strong, where to let go and where to stand his or her ground.
Love is a wonderful feeling. It's the divine within our mortal existence, but the things that make a loving relationship work are very basic human issues. To make a relationship work it takes effort and sage judgments. Unless everything is done in the right proportion, things may just end in disarray.

Art: Faces-9 by Goutam Chakraborty