At an Ominous Time

My spirit is in tatters
I throw crumpled pages and mess up the floor
 Still I can't wrap up the train of my thoughts, 
Without penning a line my mind falls apart.
Addicted to the satellite channels
I'm pasted to the TV and dawdle over my meals,
I contravene my culture and I'm in the wrong.

At the foggy winter dawn night's mood lingers
I'm cold and my body curls up into a ball;  
Feeling extremely frostbitten
Like hikers who may freeze to death 
I could never be a Hillary or Tenzing.

My nature feels anarchical
When the sun rises above the horizon, 
My heart withers inside out when I see
A nest swaying on a narrow bough;
In quest of a totality my heart beats.

Rubab Abdullah lives in Ohio, USA