Dowry

Such a situation can still be a minefield with false assumptions and unkept promises causing many problems and much distress - like dowry, in fact. Would it be out of the question for local worthy people, maybe enlightened religious leaders, to supervise promises to marry and check that both sides are quite clear what will be done and what will not be done? You see, I have noted that, in this dear culture, saying a firm, "No!" is considered rude and I fear that, when a request for dowry is made, the girl's family respond with "Well - maybe.." and the bridegroom's family go off and mentally spend the money (several times over, probably!) and then, when it is not forthcoming, they are understandably angry. Could not the arrangements concerning wedding gifts etc be made in front of those who would know what were realistic demands on the families concerned? Could they not, with growing levels of social awareness, put pressure against one-sided demands? Could not a contract be drawn up, promising to make no further demands - then everyone would know what was what? Then, if there were subsequent bad behaviour, it would not be for want of trying.

It is not only in Bangladesh but also in every country; things go wrong when someone, somewhere, does not get the contract straight!

Incidentally, my grandfather was engaged within 3 months to my grandmother, one of his Sunday School teachers and there was no mention of this engagement being supervised, so maybe it was just an English country tradition that had lingered on in distant Cornwall - but it was not a bad one, eh?