Men should learn to...

The nettle to be grasped is surely this: none of us know how to behave unless we learn by 'precept and example' and the deeds of men who behave badly (in whatever country) simply bear witness to the failure of past and present generations of older men to do this for them. Somewhere, somehow, fathers, uncles, neighbours and the ordinary people that they have met in the street, on the buses and in gatherings everywhere have failed to communicate to these guys the respect due to women and reprove them firmly for demonstrating the opposite.

And how is it, in this country, that even little girls have got the idea that the proper reaction to being raped is to commit suicide? Someone, somewhere, is communicating to the womenfolk, with crystal clarity, the total worthlessness and liability to her family of a female that has been thus rendered 'damaged goods'. Who are doing this? They must be silenced! Women cannot be educated in the truth unless men are made to take responsibility for publicly rejecting nonsense.

We must also recognise that abusive men will not receive discipline from women. They have to be faced by their fellow men. But many men, told they should say or do something when they see other men harassing women, reply, "I do not want to get involved. I might get hurt!" Precisely. Having lost a couple of generations of proper education in behaviour, there will be a cost to lifting society out of this particular gutter. Some men may indeed get hurt but what is the cost of doing nothing and who, pray, will the cost be paid by but women -- your mothers, sisters, wives and daughters?

The take-home message for those of us in education is clear. We have to be firm with all sorts of bad behaviour in school. There must be specific teaching on mutual respect in all relationships and this must be practised before the eyes of the pupils. Furthermore, I look forward to hearing further details of how, in the practice of all religions, the boys and men growing up under their teaching and preaching may be taught to practice and teach in their family lives, those attitudes that are healthy, wholesome and fair. Education in home and school, on television and, for instance, in street theatre should demonstrate role-play of common situations e.g. what to do on a bus, when you see a man harassing a woman. Looking away and pretending you have not seen -- and then bewailing the state of the nation -- should not be an option.

Who knows what effect this could have? After all, history might have been different if some men we could mention, when they were boys, had been sent to bed early, without their supper, by their fathers, for being rude to their mothers, sisters or maidservants!